Comments are closed. Previous Article Next Article GuruOn 21 May 2002 in Personnel Today Related posts:No related photos. This week’s guruEasy tiger! It’s time to pet your colleaguesThis year’s floating Human Resources Forum on board the Oriana reminded Guruof an episode of the Love Boat – but not for the usual conference shenanigans. Jonas Ridderstrale, aka Mr Funky Business, held aloft Prozac and Viagrapills during his keynote speech, warning that, unless employers and stafffoster some mutual passion about their work, their companies will be unable torise to the challenges of the new business environment. “If you can love your pet, why not your employer,” argued Jonas.He also advised delegates that the People’s Republic of Britney Spears holdsthe key to developing employer brand. Guru made a mental note to visit nexthols. Professor at the University of Lausanne, Stephane Garelli, picked up on thepet theme. Apparently, staff start as tigers, mellow into cats, before turninginto grouchy bears – only interested in life-life balance let alone work-lifebalance. Passion is needed once again. The only person lacking compassion was Celador International’s Ellis Watson.He warned HR has to be influential to survive. Poor performers are “acancer, a disease, they are AIDS”. Such a small step from workplace loveto sexually transmitted disease, thought Guru. Language of love not in his lexicon If any Oriana delegates did misinterpret the theme of love in the workplaceafter an evening of ‘networking’, they should have read last month’s Ellemagazine, which revealed that it is all too easy for passion between workmatesto get out of control at social events – 60 per cent of employees have had afling with a colleague. Guru is thankful he was able to meet Mrs Guru’s probing eye with a clearconscience on his return from the Oriana. The ladies obviously sensed he was happily married and were more interestedin management speak, than the language of love. Tardy tea rounds destroy the mystiqueGuru might favour a double espressolatte with extra froth, but Britain remains a nation of tea drinkers.Apparently six out of 10 employees drink tea regularly and overhalf prefer it to coffee – at least according to research by Pertemps. While Guru doubts all the ‘heats you up, cools you down’mumbo-jumbo, it does appear to have mystical powers. Most workers say they relyon tea to get them through the day – we get through 126,000 tons every year –and 53 per cent claim it makes them work harder. But beware, the tea run can be a flashpoint. A third ofrespondents felt resentful that colleagues do not take their turn in gettingtea. Guru suggests they sit down and discuss it over a cup of doubleespresso latte with extra froth.Thatcher or Cat? it’s a tough call Guru recently went on a management refresher, just in case he was taking hisesteemed position in the office for granted. And research by NetG shows that hewas right to do so. Its survey shows that while more than half of employeespolled compare their manager to Mrs Thatcher, nearly 60 per cent report thattheir ideal team leader would be Cat Deeley. Apparently the findings were not based on appearance alone. “Though CatDeeley’s looks may have played a part in this result, it’s not the onlyfactor,” explained a spokesman for NetG. “As a TV presenter she hasgood communication skills.” Yeah, right!